A couple following the 10 tenets of dating.

The 10 Tenets Of Dating

Noam LightstoneDating And Relationships Leave a Comment

Dating should come with a rule book, some tenets if you will, that both male and female partners agree to. Here are 10 things I would like to see written:   1. Do not use me. As a man, I am not here to listen to all your problems. I am not one of your girlfriends. If we have been together …

Shame and Hurt in Dating – Meeting Eachother’s Needs as the Solution

Noam LightstoneDating And Relationships 2 Comments

Most of us are pretty stupid when it comes to dating. We’re so afraid of getting hurt that we put up fronts, defences, tests, and issues which amount to an incredible amount of energy invested only to result in us never getting what we truly want – someone who cares and loves us for who we are. Someone who wants …


Noam LightstonePsychology 7 Comments

Learned and born from painful memories of the past throughout our lives, defences are meant to keep us safe from further traumas. Sometimes they succeed, undoubtedly. But they also accomplish a wide range of side items most do not recognize. They prevent intimacy, keep us isolated, and can lead to a cycle of continual negative feelings. They build self-imposed walls. …